So, as many of you may be aware at this point (if I do in fact have (m)any readers), I have safely and soundly made it to Toronto.
I don't know if you know this, but this is a big city. I mean, really effin' big. Wow. I have never felt more like a small town girl in my life. As a matter of fact, I've never felt more like a small town prairie girl in my life; I never did receive the memo about how often one must walk down - and, as a result, up - hill in this city. Thighs of steel, here I come. Nor did I receive the memo about how much distance there is between any one major point and another. In my neighbourhood, The Junction (West Toronto), we are fortunate enough to have all essential amenities within a 10-20 minute walk away. Grocery store (No Frills, the best/cheapest grocery store in the world - puts Price Choppers to shame), some big box stores like Home Depot, Future Shop, etc., little coffee shops all over, a really cute little pub called Aquila about a couple of blocks from home, an LCBO (Ontario's MLCC - yessss....) are all within reasonable walking distance. But downtown, for example, is definitely not within walking distance. Thankfully the transit in this city is phenomenal. Subway (FAST holy smokes), bus, street car, train; it's all here and super convenient. Colour me impressed.
I haven't quite made it downtown yet, but most of what I've seen thus far looks like something crossed between Osborne and The Exchange, with at least two tiny little privately owned variety stores per block (that's a Toronto block, not a Winnipeg block). Eclectic. Fun. Tons of great vintage shops. One we went to last week has a room in the back where you buy things by the pound. The skies have parted.
My street, Indian Road Crescent, is absolutely beautiful. Wolseley-esque. Long street with all kinds of big beautiful trees all the way down. I've found a Youth Employment Services centre just around the corner from where my street meets up with Bloor Street West, about a 15 minute walk away, where I have free and unlimited access to Internet, fax, phone, photocopier, career workshops, and career counselors. I've come to browse and apply for jobs for a good 3-4 hours the past three days in a row. But this walk has taken me about 25 minutes each time; it's gorgeous. The trees are turning all kinds of hues of yellow and orange among the still-green of the rest that haven't started to turn yet; and the splashes of the neon-orange-reddish colour of the sugar maples that burst out here and there down the street takes my breath away. I've just taken my time walking to and from home and have been mindful of the taken-for-grantedness of living surrounded by trees and birds. I love this neighbourhood already.
Although it's been less than two weeks, I somehow feel like I've made a very good decision coming here. It just feels right, like my life is catching up with my mind. I will always love Winnipeg in all of its diversity and for all of its somewhat tucked-away little gems (Mondragon, Cousins, the antiques mall in the Johnston Terminal and the antiques warehouse on Princess, Aqua Books); my fondness for my hometown seems already to increase for me every time I think of taking a new trip somewhere in the city by myself... but what I'm beginning to understand is just how much more opportunity there is for me here than in Winnipeg. I applied for a job with the Stephen Lewis Foundation in downtown Toronto two days ago for goodness' sake. Brilliant.
What is beginning to circle the outskirts of my mind, however, is whether I am actually meant to return to West/Central Africa at this point in my life. I yearn every day to be back in Maluku working with ALFEMADEC, or at Pascal's CPLB (http://meganalardcongo.blogspot.com/2009/05/partie-ii-de-ii-relations-construites.html) assisting with mediation training. I would rather be there than anywhere. But what I mean is that perhaps it has been so logistically difficult for me to return is that I don't belong there right now. Perhaps I am meant for something else. The strangest thing about this thought is that I'm not quite sure that I really believe in fate, or destiny, or that the stars align for each of us. On the other hand, I've never felt more like I was meant to do anything or be anywhere than when I was in Kinshasa. So maybe I'm here for a reason. And if I am, I am bound and determined to figure it the hell out.
Got myself lost AND found myself (for the first of what is sure to be many times) within about an hour and a half a couple of days ago. Wildly amusing. My adventure has begun. Did I mention that Toronto is really effin' big?
